Hilda and her two sons, Kojo and Kwesi are members of RLM (Radiant Life Ministries). Hilda has been a member from the beginning. From its inception in a classroom to the beautiful edifice they worship in currently. She is a devoted usher. She listened to Reverend David preach in a trotro¹ once and since then, has been their loyal member. She joined when her sons were teens.

For the past year, life has not been kind to Hilda. She has been in and out of the hospital. They have been drowning in hospital bills and the doctors do not seem to know what is wrong with her. It has been one battle after another. Today, it is her lungs, tomorrow her kidneys, the pain is unbearable.

The once bubbly, full of life usher of RLM lay weak and almost immobile in the hospital. This has been the longest she has been on admission, three months…

KOJO

The nurse placed the oxygen mask over my mother, I hated seeing her like this. She barely ate the soup I brought her. I have taken a salary advance to pay for more oxygen. I see the pity on the nurses’ face whenever I come.

 It has always been my mother and us, our dad died a long time ago. My brother Kwesi is currently outside the country pursuing his Masters’ on a scholarship. He sends a part of his stipend but it is not enough. I have borrowed from a few friends, waiting on the church welfare to help but I have not heard from them. Pastor Zoe sent some money earlier when Mama was first admitted last year but it has been radio-silent since. No calls, prayers or check-ups, just one member called Auntie Pearl from the ushering team. For the past three months, Reverend Dave has not even shown his face at her bedside or even texted us.

I read Psalm 30 to Mama as she drifted off to sleep, I squeezed her hand and left the ward. It was late as I made my way to the car park. I sat in my mother’s rickety 2009 RAV4 which I drive now. Her health has swallowed up all our finances as a family, our relief is the two-bedroom apartment she was able to buy. Thank God rent is not part of our problems.

Before I turned the ignition, my heart felt heavy. Is this my life? Will my mother ever be healed? Where will I get extra money from? I am emotionally, physically and financially drained. They say have faith but it is not looking good right now. I take a deep breath, I feel my throat dry up and tears well up in my eyes. They say a man should not cry, but fuck it. I cried, I wept…. After a while, I dried my eyes, prayed and pled with God to heal my mother. All I can do is have faith, Faith as small as a mustard seed. I muttered to myself before driving off.

I noticed the lights were on, Sena my girlfriend is in. I forgot I handed her my keys two days ago because of an errand I wanted her to run.

I entered the house and I noticed she had cleaned up. She came straight after work, she was still in her work attire. The wig on her head had seen better days, the bag I bought for her years ago too. Four years ago, I would have replaced all these without her asking. The company I worked for as a project manager collapsed. Two years ago, I had to take a job with this NGO to make ends meet. We were supposed to get married, till the job fiasco and now, my mother’s health. I am so grateful for Sena, I appreciate her. But tonight, some solitude will be nice. Her visit at this time means I have to drive her home and I am so exhausted. In addition, I am too broke to pay for her uber. I smiled as soon as our faces met so she will not read my thoughts.

‘’I made some rice and kontomire² for you. Sit and eat’’ she beckoned. I was not hungry, but to show appreciation I decided to eat. After all, it is not easy to cook. As an RM (Relationship Manager) for one of the banks, she must be exhausted. She could be sleeping in her bed right now, instead she came by to cook for me.

‘’Thank you, my love,’’ I said after I was done. I cleared the plate, I did not realise how hungry I was till I took the first bite.

‘’Always welcome. Don’t worry Kojo, Bebiara bɛyɛ okay³’’ she said as she squeezed my hand.

‘’Amen’’ I said.

‘’Have you heard from the welfare team?’’ she asked and I shook my head.

‘’Okay, I will follow up tomorrow. Just focus on Mama’’ she said.

 We washed the dishes together as I listened to her talk about her day.

‘’It is late, I have to leave’’ she said as she picked her handbag.

‘’Let me drop you home’’ I suggested.

‘’No, you look burnt out Kojo, try and get some rest. Tomorrow morning, you have to be up early to send breakfast to Mama. I will take an uber’’ she said.

‘’No, it is not safe’’ I insisted.

‘’It is fine, I will share my live location’’ she said and walked to the door before I could protest.

‘’Okay, why don’t you sleep over? I will sleep in my mum’s room and you take mine’’ I said.

‘’No Kojo, that is not advisable. We have managed to preserve ourselves all these years, let us not tempt fate in our final lap. I have money, you relax’’ she assured as she gave me a light hug.

I walked with her outside to her uber, I took pictures of the car before she left.

Sena got home safe, I took a bath and settled into bed. Like clockwork, I took my bible to pray. I love to read from a physical bible. As soon as I opened it, an envelope fell out. On the front, in a familiar handwriting, were the words ‘’For fuel to see Mama’’. I opened it, and there lay 400gh. I nearly cried, only one person can be responsible for this. I took out my phone and called.

‘’Sena, thank you but you shouldn’t have. I will pay you back’’ I said.

‘’Don’t be silly Kojo, we are in this together. She is my mother too. You were there for me when I was broke and unemployed. I am here for you. Now, get some sleep, I will see you tomorrow’’ she said.

 I prayed with her on the phone before hanging up. I read some psalms before falling asleep.

REVEREND DAVE

I walked into Deaconess Jessica’s mansion, she lived quite far from the church. I really admire her dedication and support over the years. She moved to our church after Zoe prophesied to her at a conference.

I do not understand why Zoe does not want to fully exercise her prophetic gift. This will attract more members, I am able to prophesy once in a while but it is not my main calling. I have been blessed to teach and encourage. Madam Jessica and her husband are our principal donors, our building would not have advanced as quickly if it weren’t for them, thank God for bringing them to my church.

‘’Reverend, you have to help me pray for my children ooo. Kudjoe is still not serious and Nuerkie is not even dating’’ Madam said after we had exchanged pleasantries.

Her husband had left for work. Her son, Kudjoe is always a source of concern, according to the family. He is supposed to run the business but is busy chasing the pipe dream of being an artiste manager. Their daughter, Nuerkie who I have met on numerous occasions is your definition of a strong woman. She is so smart and career driven but her mother’s worry is that her 32 year old daughter is still not married.

‘’Madam Jessica, I have told you already. God has everything under control’’ I encouraged.

‘’Eh.. why? did you see something in the spirit?’’ she asked with eagerness.

‘’Hahahaha, not everything is revealed. We have fasted and prayed, God’s time is the best’’ I said.

‘’What about Kudjoe? Have you managed to talk to him?’’ she asked

‘’He does not pick my calls, but.. do not attack him. Don’t worry, in God’s time he will find his way. Let us not stop praying for him. You asked me to come over to pray concerning an emergency. What is the situation?’’ I asked.

‘’This is it oooo! Reverend Dave!! My children ooooo’’ she started wailing dramatically and knelt to the floor.

Of course, this constitutes to an emergency for her. I encouraged her and prayed with her. We made some declarations before she was able to calm down. She started insisting we drive to her children’s offices right away and pray for them too. I tactically discouraged her, I reminded her that if Jesus’ command was enough to heal the Centurion’s daughter. This is something small. I promise to call Nuerkie later in the day and pray for her. She sowed a seed of 5000ghs for the prayer session. I thanked her, and prayed for her one more time. This is why she will never lack, what a giver. I know God has heard our prayers.

I did not realise I had spent almost half of the day at Madam Jessica’s. I guess Hilda’s visit will have to wait. I drove to the church to finalise the decision to bring Pastor Jay, we are yet to meet in person. So far, our calls have been virtual. My only concern was the fact that he is not yet married but he comes heavily recommended and scandal free. Moreover, he refused a salary, which is good for the church. We need to save every cedi we can spare towards the building of a new branch. He is a trained physiotherapist and will be working at his parents’ private clinic. This is too good to be true, a perfect example for the young men to emulate.

After a long day of making calls and visiting the new church site, I returned home. Zoe was not yet back, she earlier to inform me of her late arrival. Davida, with the assistance of Fiona our help attended to dinner.

During dinner,

“Mama told me about the promotion, too bad I will not be getting my dream car when I turn 18’’ Davida said, but David and Zack were too engrossed with their phones to hear.

‘’Do you not believe in miracles? God will make a way’’ I encouraged.

‘’I do, but Uncle Yaw was so excited for mummy, he got her flowers only to hear she had rejected it’’ she said.

‘’Flowers eh?’’ I asked.

‘’Yes, a huge one, see, I took pictures’’ Davida said and showed me the images on her phone. I smiled at it.

‘’Awww too bad, he will understand one day, especially when he marries. Anyway, how was your day?’’ I asked changing the topic.

Yaw always gets Zoe the best gifts, I try not to complain. It will seem insecure, I am sure if she asks for a new car, he will get it for her. I thought these gifts will stop when we got married, but no way. He tried with the children but I drew the line. Thank God Zoe is not tempted by these things. I really married the right one. At the end, she will enjoy the cupcakes I sent.

Zoe came home quite late, I was already in bed.

‘’I heard your boyfriend got you flowers’’ I teased as soon as she nestled close to me.

‘’Davida told you eh, yes oo. You should see the way he was furious. I told him he will never understand’’ she said.

‘’Same thing I told Davida, a balanced home is needed for everyone’’ I said as I slid closer to her.

‘’But the money will go a long way and even the travel opportunities…’’ she said in a pensive tone.

‘’heyyyy Zoe, we prayed and spoke about this. It is not over, we agreed that not now. It will eventually happen’’ I muttered in her ear as I rubbed her arm.

‘’yeah, I know. How was your day?’’ she asked.

‘’Good, I spent most of my day with Madam Jessica..’’ I answered, just then my phone started ringing. It was Madam Jessica.

‘’It is like she heard her name’’ I said before answering.

‘’This kind God ooo, I never see your type ooo, this kind God ooo’’ Madam Jessica started singing when I picked up. I sang with her.

‘’What has the Lord done, my sister?’’ I asked

‘’You see why it is good we prayed today. God really hears our prayers and you are truly a man of God’’ she said.

‘’Madam Jessica, you are keeping me in suspense. Share the testimony’’ I said.

‘’Let me be quick so you can spend time with Mama Zoe. My daughter just called me, I have been trying to set her up with some men I know. You know… just to talk to them. She always disagrees and warns me. We have had quarrels over my concern for her spinsterhood. Tonight, out of nowhere, she calls me that she is interested in my offer. Isn’t this a miracle? I know she will have to date for some time, but this is a step I am glad about!! Thank you Reverend!! God bless you’’ she exclaimed with so much joy.

‘’All glory goes to God, we will continue in prayer. Do not be too hard on Nuerkie, just watch and pray’’ I advised.

We spoke for half an hour before she hung up.

‘’What did your sugar mummy say?’’ Zoe joked and we laughed.

I briefed her about my day and the call.

‘’Were you able to see Hilda?’’ Zoe asked.

‘’No ooo, unfortunately. I will do that tomorrow after the meeting with the elders’’ I answered.

‘’What about calling Kojo? or Damson checking with welfare? ‘’ she asked.

‘’Oh! I totally forgot’’ I said and smacked my forehead.

‘’Dave, I am very uncomfortable with this. She has been on admission for over two months now. She is one of our longest serving members. With people like her, forget protocol. You could have sent some of the money Madam Jessica gave you to her…’’ Zoe nagged.

‘’Who said Madam Jessica gave me money?’’ I interrupted her.

‘’Come on Dave, she always does’’ she answered.

‘’I have heard you, tomorrow I will go and see Hilda. Now come closer, you look sweet tonight’’ I dismissed as I inched closer to fulfil one of my duties as her husband.

Meanwhile….

KOJO

Everything became blurry all of a sudden, Mama started gasping for air and was rushed to the emergency. Later, the doctor announced her passing to me. Ah! Mama did not try! My friend, Nii came with me to see Mama. He witnessed everything, he stood by me.

‘’Chale, I know it’s hard but we need to sort things out’’ he said in gentle voice. Nii buried his father last year and his mother, two years prior.

He switched to funeral mode quickly, and aided with the mortuary run and even payments. I texted my brother and Sena the news.

We are not close to our extended family, the only family my mother had was the church. I will wait in the morning before I text Reverend Dave. Right now, I needed to shout. There was this pain in my chest, the kind of pain that sits comfortably, the pain that you know is not going anywhere.

Where is God? My brother and I are orphans now! What a cruel world…

After running around and sorting out the morgue errands, Nii and I drove home. Sena was there already, I hugged her and held back tears. I will cry later, I need to be strong especially for my brother, Kwesi. I video called him, I was happy he was surrounded by friends. He did not look too good. We had a quick meeting to decide next plan of action.

I have seen how family members can drag a funeral, thank God we are not close to any of them. Being the planner she is, my mother started contributing to a funeral home early in life. I remember when she was healthy, one random day, she came back from a funeral which was so disorganised. She sat me down and gave me all the important documents and access to all her accounts and information. I laughed it off while taking note, I did not think this day will come so soon.

I emailed my boss to take two days off, tomorrow I will go to the funeral home and make final arrangements.  I do not intend to drag this, Mama Hilda’s wish was not to stay too long in a morgue. I took all the documents, prayed over her room and locked the door. I went to my room, I was so exhausted from the day, I just fell asleep. I forgot to talk to Nii or Sena. I just wanted to be alone.

One week later

I was able to schedule my mother’s funeral for the next month. My brother will be coming down from Europe. I still needed more money to finalise the arrangements. After the betrayal from the church, after serving them, they could not even show their face at the hospital. I have decided not to involve them. I will be coordinating everything at the funeral home. I have asked one of close friends who is an MC to come officiate the ceremony. Revered Dave and some elders came the next day after her death but I ignored them. I was not in the mood, I have been avoiding Mama Zoe’s call too. She left a huge sum of money from her personal coffers with Sena for funeral arrangements. I demanded that Sena return it to her.

I was engrossed in thinking of where to get extra money to finalise these things. It is the weekend and I am in no mood to engage visitors. I will never touch Mama Zoe’s money. Just then there was a video call coming from my brother and a foreign number. I answered and that number was Pastor Sammy. Our former youth pastor, I was glad to hear from him.

As soon as I picked his call, he offered his condolence and was slightly upset with me for not mentioning my mother’s last visit to the hospital.

‘’I knew you had just relocated and I wanted you to settle down’’ I explained.

‘’No, your mother and I worked in the church for years, you could have made an exception. Anyway, I understand these things, sometimes the last thing on your mind is broadcasting your problems. Accept my condolence once more, I will not be able to make it to the funeral but please do not hesitate to call me when you want to talk, or cry your your heart out. This goes to both of you’’ he said.

‘’Sure, thank you Pastor Sammy’’ I said.

‘’Aha! One more thing, I know you are disappointed with the church and furious with the way things were handled. It is justified, but this is why we are all members Kojo. For the sake of Auntie Hilda, your mother, allow the church conduct and help with the funeral’’ he pleaded.

‘’No Pastor Sammy, that is impossible!’’ I said, I could feel my anger rising up.

‘’Bro, please cool down, I beg , just listen to pastor’’ my brother pleaded.

‘’I understand the anger you feel, Kojo, it is valid. But please do not let your mother’s years of dedication go down the drain. You know her beliefs and core values, will she be happy if the church does not coordinate her funeral? We can always address these issues after the funeral and work towards a proper welfare system so this does not befall another church member. Right now, your mother’s wishes are all that matters. Please pray on it’’ Pastor Sammy said in an earnest voice.

‘’Big Bro, lets just do it for Mama, it will even cut down the cost and other things’’ Kwesi added.

‘’I will think about it’’ I said and ended the call.

Not long, Sena came from the kitchen, she sat beside me on the couch. She looks beautiful in her neat cornrows and simple black dress. What did I do to deserve such an amazing girlfriend.

‘’I know this is extremely difficult for you, but consider Pastor Sammy’s advice. We will address our grievances with the church later but your mother will love a proper church burial’’ Sena said as she held my hand.

I knew they were right. After deep reflection, I agreed to Pastor Sammy’s plea. Just then she placed a call to Mama Zoe. In less than an hour, she was already in the house with Pastor Isaac and Imelda (our church busy body as well as choir member). I wonder why Reverend did not even show his face…

One month later….

Hilda’s funeral went smooth, it was solemn and well organised. Kojo was able to keep a brave face till he got to the cemetery.  A part of him was glad that he allowed the church to assist with the organisation. The outpouring of love that day was comforting, if only Hilda was alive to experience it…

Meanwhile, back at the church after everyone had left. Reverend Dave, Zoe and Pastor Isaac sit in Reverend’s office.

ZOE

Funerals have a way of draining me emotionally, I never thought there will come a day I will never see Hilda. Now she’s gone.

‘’We really need to do something about the church welfare and visitation of members’’ I said.

‘’Yes, and I have come to a decision. Since Pastor Isaac is our assistant reverend now, I am tasking you to come up with a proper structure to ensure we are in constant communication with our members’’ Dave said. I was surprised, he must have really thought about it.

‘’I will gladly take on this task and you need to fire Damson’’ Pastor Isaac added.

‘’Awo!!! Thank God for your life. I have said this countless of times’’ I blurted.

‘’Yes, he is slow with processing the welfare cheques and even for the general running of the church’’ Dave agreed.

‘’I have some concerns about that too, and I fear, Mama Zoe, I will need you to work your financial magic on the records. I mean innocent until proven guilty, but I believe Damson has been siphoning some funds. I will get the records and then we see what next’’ Pastor Isaac said.

‘’Sure, anytime’’ I said.

‘’And when will you be joining the church full time Mama Zo? we need you ooo’’ Pastor Isaac asked.

‘’Hmmmm’’ Dave sighed.

‘’God’s time is the best. When is the youth pastor coming?’’ I asked, redirecting the conversation.

‘’Soon, I invited him for the preservice meeting, come sit with us in the conference room‘’ Dave said and I followed him.

As soon as I entered the conference room and my eyes landed on the new youth pastor, I was tongue-tied for a moment.

REVEREND DAVE

‘’Ei Zoe, what have we done?’’ I asked as soon as we drove into our house.

After the preservice meeting, we could not talk. During our ride home, we gave lift to some of the choir members who came for rehearsal. Hence I was waiting for us to be alone in the car.

‘’Are you worried? I am not, after hearing him speak. No wahala’’ Zoe reassured.

Pastor Jay and I have only communicated on phone, I had never seen him in person. The camera did not do much justice to his features. The man is tall and handsome with the voice of a late night radio show host.

‘’My love, hmmmmm, was it just me or he has this power….’’ I said.

‘’He has an alluring presence, a bit intimidating but that is good for the youth’’ Zoe interrupted.

‘’I know but what about the women, he is single ooo. I have heard too many scandals about single youth pastors and women’’ I said.

‘’If a man is principled, he is principled, whether single or married. We have also heard scandals about married pastors having mistresses. Moreover Hugh and others have said good things about him. Then you interacted with him, you loved his energy. God looks at the the heart so why are you doubting yourself now. Even Mildred, Hugh’s wife assured me of his firm boundaries with the women of the church so no issues. I am very confident things will work out’’ Zoe added.

‘’Is it your logical side speaking or your prophetic?’’ I asked.

‘’Don’t be silly, if anything Pastor Isaac will watch him like a hawk. Worry about how you will apologise to Kojo and finding Damson’s replacement’’ Zoe said.

‘’As Pastor Isaac said, innocent until proven guilty’’ I said.

‘’You know Isaac is a meticulous man, he already has his evidence. He is just using the appropriate channels. I like that about him’’ She said.

‘’True, anyway, let me rest before tomorrow’s service’’ I said as I stepped out of the car and walked to the main door.

I hope this Jay works out for us.

Author’s Note

Church hurt and betrayal is real. It is sad that the place that should provide comfort, warmth and love turns their back on you. And to those who have lost a loved one or grieving at the moment, prayers up and may you receive strength to continue living. Do not lose hope.

Do you think Kojo should have still allowed the church to bury his mother? And what advice will you give RLM concerning their welfare system?

Discuss in the comments.

Lexicons

1. Trotro – a popular form of public transportation in Ghana.
2. Kontomire – leaves of the cocoyam plant, widely used in Ghanaian cooking.
3. Bebiara bɛyɛ okay – All will be well